July 1, 2016 by Polarn O. Pyret
Christina and her husband decided to go through open adoption and they share all their thoughts and emotions from their life on their blog- http://www.fifiandmo.com/. Little Finley was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy at 15 months, but that doesn’t stop them from taking on the world together with a smile on their face.
Did you know FIFI had Cerebral Palsy when you adopted her?
Not officially. When we were chosen to be her parents, she was a typical, healthy fetus. Because of her prematurity, she suffered Brain-bleeding which caused the Cerebral Palsy. We considered her ours from the moment we were picked, nothing was going to change that. The Adoption was finalized when she was 14 months old, she was formally diagnosed the following month. It was obvious that she had substantial physical delays and would likely be diagnosed.
How did your friends & relatives react to the adoption? Was there a different response on social media?
Our Friends and Family were all supportive. I think it did surprise them that we skipped any sort of infertility treatments, and went straight to adoption. It was when we started trying to educate them on the benefits of Open-Adoption that we noticed the concerned looks on the faces. They were all just looking out for us, its not a very typical situation to be in a functioning open-adoption. The response on social media was more about how “lucky” our child was, and that we were “doing a good thing.” When in reality it felt quite the opposite. WE were the lucky ones, and “good thing”?! I wanted a baby so badly, I don’t see it as a “charitable” or “honorable” thing. I merely just grew my family in an unconventional way
Your happiness and LOVE shine through in social media- Was it hard to stay positive? We all know the first years with kids can be quite exhausting.
Aww, thank you that is so sweet of you to say. Honestly, we have fun and just capture parts of our real life. The good and the bad. There's a good chunk of the time I’m crying as I write something. My tears are of LOVE and happiness most of the time, but there’s definitely hard days. My first year as a mom was all about over-preparation and paranoia. As a new mom and a preemie mom I was hyper sensitive to her needs. I knew each and every cry, measured everything, charted every, and was a freak about her schedule. Isn’t every new mom though? I cried a lot. That was just normal. I lost my dad to a traumatic brain injury following a motorcycle accident. I sat in his hospital room and watched him in a coma, not get better for 4 weeks. It was the hardest thing I've ever experienced. So, There I was 8 months later in a very similar ICU room with my daughter. She was born with a brain injury, it was like Deja Vu. Only this time I was able to watch her get better and stronger and healthier. The perspective I’ve gained through all of these big moments is something I’m incredibly thankful for. All that and I’m an emotional person to begin with, so there’s bound to be tears.
What's your favorite thing to do together on a day off?
Our favorite thing to do on a day off is go on a little adventure. Any outing anywhere. Grab a good bite to eat. Then Sing Songs on the way home. Super simple, but we cherish those simpler days.
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